Swedish Girl In London

London Life: Bright Lights, Big City. Now what's on TV?

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Once More, With Feeling

Is it just me, or does recording your voicemail bring out the paranoid diva in all of us?

First you require a couple of practice sessions. For instance, you remember somebody telling you once that you should speak from your stomach, and you make a feeble attempt in this direction. The result? Your voice takes on a slight Jabba The Hut quality. After two or three efforts, you give up.

If you are a foreigner, you then start tweaking your accent. In normal life, you have long since given up on trying to sound like a native and embraced your Scandinavian lilt. On the phone, however, you for some reason want to sound like Kirsty Wark.

Now come the actual recording sessions. If this is done in a busy office environment, with work mates cackling at you in the back ground, the process will be protracted.

“You sound like a Muppet,” someone might tell you gleefully.
“Why don’t you add rock on at the end,” someone else will suggest, alluding to an unfortunate episode in the past when you used this phrase (purely by mistake).
“Eff off,” you will mutter sulkily. This last comment will probably end up being the one that you (also by mistake) leave as your outgoing message

Good luck, people, and remember to speak after the beep.


At 2:29 PM, Anonymous mia said...

Åh - I so wish I could write English like you!


And how true, the post. And it doesn't make things better that you absolutely hate hearing your own recorded voice.

At 2:29 PM, Blogger Ant said...

God yes, voicemail messages are a trial.

I don't try to go for Kirsty Wark but there is definitely a Scottish sports presenter feel about it when I listen back (a *very* bad thing...)

Friends take the mick, but my Mum thinks it "lovely". Hooray for blind, unconditional love...

At 5:57 PM, Blogger Swedish Girl said...

Thanks Mia!! But guys, just stop by her blog to check out her English... not bad, I'd say.

Ant - I think you are too hard on Scottish sports presenters. I've always quite liked those guys who comment on football.

At 9:30 PM, Blogger Steve said...

When I recorded my work voicemail message I was trying to do it so no one around would notice I was doing it.

It sounds like I'm whispering, but point blank refuse to do it again!

At 12:39 AM, Blogger Zen Wizard said...

As corny as it sounds, you get the best results if you type out your script double-spaced and try to impersonate the Morning Drive DJ on a Top Forty radio station.

This technique always brings out your best possible sound.

At 7:12 AM, Blogger ChickyBabe said...

I.hate.my.voice.recorded. Period.

At 7:20 AM, Anonymous Vaguely Urban said...

I say, work a little Swedish accent when recording in English and vice versa, and you're good to go!

At 9:16 AM, Blogger Helen said...

I hate the sound of my voice on my voicemail - I can't really sound like that in real like can I?! Helen (P.S In answer to your question the snow is all soft and powdery here, but the roads and pavements are just like one giant icerink!!)

At 11:44 AM, Blogger Léonie said...

I always sound about seven years old in voicemail messages and on my answerphone. I also say 'um..' quite a lot.

Which sounds really cool, and professional.

At 3:47 PM, Blogger Me:The Sequel said...

I like to wait for when I have a nasty chest cold to leave my voicemail greeting, otherwise it is criminally cheery and sing-songy which naturally pisses people off. So, a good bronchitis or throat infection comes along and away I go.

My voice then takes on a throaty quality that reminds me a bit of that girl in the Exorcist. A vast improvement in my estimation.

At 11:00 AM, Blogger Rocío said...

Yes! I remember I recorded my own voice-box recording once, but one my friends left me a message + another saying: "and hey...please, DELETE that soppy and horrid message of yours!!! you sound stupid!". Now I have the common: Ha llamado al.....por favor, deje su mensaje después de oir la señal"..beeeeeeep


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